As with everything, I am late with my 2024 roundup.
I had already posted about some of the challenges of the first half of 2024, but I had plans for 2H’2024.
And I do mean plans. Like Evan Buckley with clipboard level of plans. I had a prioritized list of the long fics to work on, the shorter stories, and a list of the stories that just needed editing to get them up on my site. Yeah, there’s a whole list of stories that are just stalled in editing. Blergh.
Plus there were all the stories on the QB site that I’ve still not moved over to my site.
Plans… I swear that whole quote about the best-laid plans is a fucking nightmare. Ugh.
I won’t get into it all, but things got weird, got rough, got fucked up beyond all recognition. At one point, I thought I was moving out of state with one week’s notice. Fortunately, that got called off, but the stress was real. Now, I’m moving in-state with one month’s notice, which is much better, and the move is for a good reason rather than an annoying one. Still, moving sucks, even if the end result is good.
I think the big tell of how badly 2024 went was I rolled into February with over 30k unread emails in my fandom email account. Across all my accounts, it’s upwards of 200k. My number of unread text messages is embarrassing. Family has started calling my mother asking for proof of life. I’ll just start posting feet pics to everyone until they surrender.
Speaking of unread emails. I’m working my way backward through them. I should probably work my way forward, but whatever. No matter what, a bunch of stuff fell on the floor. My apologies if you needed my attention and I ignored you. If you had sent me an email and needed something, you’re welcome to email again. I actually am reading email now—at least several times a week.
I did keep 90% of the weird/FUBAR to myself last year because there was nothing to be done about it, but the biggest casualty was my writing (dammit!), which sucked large because writing is a big part of my mental/emotional health. There was still some writing going on, but I don’t think my writing has ever been so fragmented or weird. I have files with a few paragraphs, and then other files with a few thousand words that I had to wonder at later. I’ll put it all in a folder labeled “Do not touch until 2026!”
I still participated in Rough Trade, but I let some goofy questions throw me off in November. To the point that there was a whole chapter written I didn’t post because I was just done with the whole experience. Sometimes, you have to put your mental health first, and I was over it, so I quietly pulled out to keep from stabbing my monitor with a spork.
Anywho… things are getting better. Positive changes going on, but lots of change, even for good reasons, are still stressful.
With all the turbulent seas in my life, there’s nothing like people being weird to make me get my WTF? face out.
My website was another casualty of the chaos bubble last year. I basically didn’t touch my website for months. So, amusingly, this is when someone decided it was the absolutely perfect time to start commenting on my site about how I misjudged Tim McGee in my stories or my discussion of Dead Air… or whatever.
Yeah, sure.
Then, when I didn’t respond (because I wasn’t on my site at all), they decided I was ignoring them and didn’t want their precious words to get out—or whatever conspiracy nonsense they’d cooked up in their brain.
So they commented more. And more.
Then they had a friend come and comment in the same vein.
I can’t even… Does it ever occur to folks like this that the reason someone may not reply is that they have other things to do than entertain their nonsensical ramblings about fiction that they clearly don’t like and yet chose to read as a form of mental torture just so they could have something to complain about? Who has time for that?
I don’t actually want to participate in your mental health issues, Debbie. (or whatever your name is. I’m reclaiming Karen for all the Karens I know who are lovely people). Nevertheless, since you so desperately wanted to be heard, I’ve approved your nonsense so you don’t feel unfairly censored, but all I have to say is:
DON’T LIKE, DON’T READ, YOU FUCKING NITWIT.
I’m not going to debate with you about whether or not we see the camera pan in and fingers turn down a volume knob. Good fucking grief. Get a grip.
I honestly don’t need people to agree with me, but why would anyone seek out my work if they didn’t like Tony DiNozzo and were a big fan of McGee? That feels pointed. I love that most of my readers are grownups who know how to hit the back button when something isn’t to their taste. I accept that not every story of mine will entertain every reader. It’s cool. It’s also fine that we don’t all see canon the same way. (Have you ever had a debate about Harry Potter canon? If you haven’t, save your sanity and don’t engage!)
Moving on…
And on…
I do have a plan for 2025, but it’s a little less Clipboard!Buck over here. I’m going to be posting several stories before midnight on the 28th for Create Your Own Bingo on Just Write. I wanted to have all the stories done before I started posting, and I’m a little down to the wire, so it’ll be a bit of a glut on the site. I figure we’ll all survive.
On a final note. Something that comes up periodically is people with story specifications seeking an author for their idea (I say specification because they’re usually much more defined than a simple prompt, with full outlines and character bibles and such).
I have never been in the business of farming out prompts. I don’t personally work with prompts longer than a sentence in length. I don’t even do Reverse Bangs anymore because challenges started allowing artists to get too prescriptive about the art as a prompt, rather than allowing it to be inspiration.
It’s not my thing. If you like a very detailed prompt, that’s fine. I don’t like them; I never have. So, I don’t match people up for them, and I won’t now or ever seek out authors to write a prompt on behalf of someone else.
Who has time for that?
If only one person had come to me with such a thing (or come to Keira and others, for that matter) it wouldn’t be worth mentioning, but it comes up over and over. Perhaps it’s worth having a discussion on Just Write about why prompts can be toxic AF, but that’s not for here and not for right now.
Because I’ve rambled long enough.
The big downside to not posting for so long is I’ve missed seeing many of you in my comments who I don’t connect with in any other way because you’re not on Discord. If you are one of my readers who I’m not talking to regularly on CrossRoads, know that I’ve thought of you, I’ve loved reading your remarks as I’m catching up on nearly a year of site comments, and I look forward to our interactions in the coming year.
I hope your 2024 was good, and that 2025 is as good as it can be. I know a lot of people are struggling right now. Know you’re appreciated and loved, and we will all get through these turbulent times.
Peace to you all,
-JJ
How 2024 felt…
Glad to hear things are starting to look up for you. Hope this year is better. Please take care of yourself and until you are able to post again I will absolutely enjoy rereading all the fantastic gifts of imagination here on your site. Zen hugs to you.
Glad things are coming around! I recently had someone jump into the comments of a 19 year old fic and ask for more and then get weird about me saying “uh, no” so I guess the weird is contagious this year.
I had that exact thing happen this week – someone offered to do art for a fic I abandoned over 20 years ago!
Thank you so much for posting this update. The proof of life is happily received. Please no feet pics. lol
Hope you’re new changed level out so you can enjoy the good they may bring. 💜💚💙
Take care of yourself, Jilly. While the assholes abound, the rest of us know you’re human and will post as you can.
Thanks for everything.
Just glad to see that you posted and are alive and kicking. I was seriously concerned that you were dying … sooooo relieved that you are as okay as any of us can be in this very troubling time.
This year has lasted a decade. You have been missed – but then, when I find myself wishing for new Jilly James fic that’s a magical opportunity to read some old favorites. Which I have done. Multiple times. Sending you chaos-calming vibes!
I am just thrilled to see you back. You’ve been missed.
Ignore the idiots, take care of yourself, and write when and what you can. I also have a whole file of ‘omg, wtf is this!’ that I’m not touching with a ten foot pole. When you’re in a better place, hopefully things will be better!
Always tend to your physical and mental well-being first. Everything else can wait until you are back on an even keel. All of your readers look forward to what you share in your own time. Thank you.
So happy and glad to see you back!
Let the past in the past and future to the future, enjoy the present that it is now!
I hope everything will work out well with your moving and that it’ll be as smooth as possible.
We’ve missed you!
I always assume you have shit going on and send positive thoughts out into the universe on your behalf ❤️
Here’s to a more cooperative 2025 and fewer assholes!
I don’t comment much, but I adore your fics that are in fandoms I am familiar with. (Not really into 9-1-1 right now. Maybe in the future.)
Just wanted to offer – if you need a proofreader I would be happy to help. Have a BA in English Writing – I am just bad at writing characters for more that a chapter or two.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I really love your work it keeps me sane. If you can shove the neigh sayers away and remember those who love your work
Hey Jilly,
I love your writing but in the end it’s something you do for free. You are 100% correct to put yourself first.
I hope 2025 and onward are kinder to you.
Thank you for all your work and I hope life is a little less jam side down in the future. I am so very grateful for all the worlds you have created that have given me such shelter over the years.
With love B.
Phew, Jilly, what a year you’ve had. Wish I was in the same country so I could bring round cupcakes, have a bitchfest and help you move. Ignore the pillocks, enjoy the good and most of all, look after yourself. Sending lots of hugs, Hxx
I’m sorry your last year was so stressful, I know how disheartening it can be when nothing goes the way you hope. Here’s hoping 2025 goes your way, and please know I look forward to enjoying whatever you share with us this year
Life has a way of tripping us up when we least expect it. Taking care of yourself is far more important than our entertainment. May the rest of 2025 be far easier on us all.
I am sorry to hear how tough your last year has been. It’s a true sign of strength to recognize your needs and put them first. I really love reading your stories but your health and well being should always come first. Best wishes for a lot better new year. I look forward to reading your stories when you are up to writing more
I’m sending warm thoughts and happy snuggly puppies. Thanks for the update/proof of life.
Protect your peace! Good luck with the move!
Sometimes one’s brain is too frazzled to write and fretting about it just makes it worse, but I am glad that you are feeling better about things.
I love your stories and they have that magical quality that makes them just as good on rereading, so thank you for that.
You’ve definitely been going through the wars so to speak. Hope the move is as smooth as any move can be and that this year is calmer for you. <3 <3 <3
Lovely to hear from you! As with Keira, though I do miss reading new stuff from you, I was mainly concerned that you were OK. There seem to be even more avenues than there ever were for RL trouble for people and having seen at least one fic writer post on AO3 that they were *extremely* ill, any radio silence starts to feel like potentially terrible news ahead. It probably doesn’t help that 2024 had its own measure of bad news for me too.
Anyway, here’s hoping things go well from here. For all of us! Please don’t think we’re just waiting for you to post new fics. Just hearing from you in any way is great – a chat, a moan, a rant. (The latter seem very apt at the moment!)
Very happy to see you back, but always take care of yourself first!
I’m wishing you a better 2025!
I think you’re lovely and enjoy your work a great deal. Thank you.
I’m sorry that your year has been the personification of the Chinese curse… May you live in interesting times… I’m glad things are better. Some of the most positive things in life are totally the most stressful. I’m sorry for your stress but happy for your move if it makes you happy. Well feet aren’t my thing if you wanna post them, I’ll look at them… Lol… Please know How much the rest of us care and support you. I wish there was more that we could do. But please know for every asshole out there there are probably 1000 of us who would gladly play hit minions for you.
This next part is just something that I hope makes you laugh. I recently discovered that my children have what amounts to a twilight bark situation to make sure that somebody has checked in on me every day for some sort of proof of life, even if they don’t call me or I don’t realize it. I was both touched and highly amused when I found out about it the other day. It seems like if I don’t respond quickly enough when they get in touch with me they start combing my social media to see what I posted last and check with each other to see if the other has heard from me. I’m still laughing. So maybe the foot thing isn’t a bad idea.💋💋💋💋
I’ve missed your work this year–I’m so spoiled to be able to read your work! I hope that 2025 treats you better and I look forward to anything you share!
So nice to get an update from one of my favorite authors, even with the fuckedupedness. Personally, I love your Tony D and NCIS fic.
Yay! I’m so glad you’re back!! The last post you had on your site mentioned an eye surgery, so I was kinda worried. But then I ended up joining the discord and saw you posting there. I was so relieved, I just figured life was being life. I’m so glad things have calmed down enough that you’re able to post again. Take all the time you need. Thank you for all the stories you have written!! I adore them!
All I can say is “Ouch”. Have a comfort food day some time soon. What you had/have is worse than my two days of a bad night with a grump ending with two emergencies. Pancakes and bacon from a good greasy spoon diner for me after my third night. When you are in a good place, that is my suggestion. Have a comfort food day.
I have been thinking of you often and sending good thoughts your way! I reread everything these last few months and I am so glad life has calmed a bit.
I wonder if a new generation of untaught has discovered the non AO3 author sites? Maybe send all of the crazy entitled commenters to learn from the writing and junk podcast. It helped me understand and see things from a different point of view once I discovered it.
I always appreciate how well your writing helps me see actions and interactions and consequences in a new light. I tend to be very literal and miss all the nuance in shows. I think that’s why I prefer reading. Thanks again for sharing. I am going to happily immerse myself in my first read of your new posts today. Virtual hugs and I’ll keep sending good thought your way!
Sorry last year was so rough on you! Yeah, as someone who has been around fandom for a long, long (long) time there are far too many people who take it entirely to seriously. I was there – observing not participating – during the original The Sentinel wars. HaHa.
Hi,
I’m you’re back! I was worried you were gone for good for a while. Sadly, I’ve lost a lot of great authors over the years. Usually chased out by commentors. I learned something valuable years ago.
How to mass delete emails and start over. How to admit I’ve got better things to do and just can’t read them all. I also learned to filter my emails of things i don’t want to read and mass delete those asap. It all helps keep me mentally healthy.
Thanks for the new stuff, I’ll read it all and probably reread your old stuff.
Glad you’re feeling better.
I’m so happy to read your post and so sorry that 2024 sucked! The proof of life is so appreciated. I’m sorry people have been assholes. I love your stories and I thank you for sharing your brilliant brain and creativity with all of us! Sending love and care through all of the stressful changes that you’re dealing with right now.
People can be so weird, and free stuff makes some people extra crazy. Hope 2025 turn out better!
So who hit you with the Chinese curse?